Top 10 Questions Asked by New Caregivers—and Why They Matter
Becoming a caregiver is done out of love. It may happen suddenly, or be expected, but the feelings of uncertainty, frustration, and responsibility can quickly set in when you don’t know what to do. Whether you are caring for a parent, spouse, child, or another loved one, it is normal to feel overwhelmed. You are not alone.
Where do I even start?
Overwhelm in the beginning is normal. Between paperwork, appointments, and daily care, there is a lot to learn. The best thing to do is start small. Make a list of contacts, medications, and appointments. Build from there. Small steps will make you feel more confident. In time you will adjust and know which things are a priority.
How do I balance caregiving with my own life?
This is one of the hardest parts of caregiving—and varied by situation. You can’t pour into someone else with an empty cup. Ask for help. Find ways to have an hour or two to recharge and refuel. Create a list of people you can train to take your place for respite care. Your well-being affects the kind of care you give.
How do I know what kind of help my loved one needs?
This will change over time. Start by talking with their healthcare team. Some needs are immediate. Other needs may present themselves as time goes on. Observe daily routines and look for areas of concern. This could range from needing occupational therapy to mental healthcare. Getting the help they need is not a sign you have done something wrong—it is a sign that you care enough to act.
What resources or financial assistance are available?
There can be a lot of help out there if you know where to look, who to ask. First, I would check with your friends who may have been in similar situations. Check in with your church. They may have a benevolence fund. Also see if there is a social worker connected with your doctor’s office. They often have their finger on the pulse of these things and are aware of resources specific to your diagnosis.
How do I communicate effectively with healthcare providers?
You are now your loved one’s advocate. Always have a way of keeping notes at appointments. Write down questions ahead of time, and never be afraid to ask for clarification. Communication is essential on both sides, if proper care is to be achieved.
What signs do I look for that my loved one’s condition is changing?
Keep notes and trust your instincts. Subtle changes in appetite, mood, sleep, or mobility can signal bigger issues. You know your loved one best—advocate for them by contacting the care team with updates when you are concerned.
How do I take care of myself without feeling guilty?
Every caregiver struggles with this. Rest is essential if we want to do the best job. Don’t think of self-care as selfish. Take small bits of time if larger ones aren’t available. Coffee with a friend, a walk in nature, and time spent in prayer can all make a large difference in your spirit and strength.
What legal paperwork issues should I be aware of?
My best advice here is plan ahead. Get documents like a power of attorney or advance directive in place to save time and frustration later on. These can be difficult ideas to confront when we are healthy, but it is protection for both you and the one in your care. Check with a social worker or attorney to get things started.
What if I make a mistake or can’t handle it all?
Give yourself grace—do your best with the information you have at the time and make your decisions accordingly. No caregiver is perfect. You will continue learning as you go. Start with prayer and when possible, make these decisions as a family.
How can I find emotional support?
Isolation is a common problem with caregivers. By finding us here, you are already on your way to connecting with a community that understands. Look for online resources, reach out to your church, and find a support group. Share your burdens, and blessings, with others—you will find strength and hope in community.
If you found this blog today you are already on the right track. You have cared enough about doing a good job as a caregiver to do research. Ask questions when you have them. And remember, this is a journey and not a sprint. Run the race set before you with endurance, lean on others for support, and give grace when you feel you unworthy of the task.
